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Jordi

Jordi: Schizophrenic, with autistic tendencies. He’s afraid of garbage cans, all garbage cans, because he believes them to be ears. Ears that will hear him. Only his “jiggler”–a doorknob tied to a long string–can offer him an comfort or protection.

We are all afraid of something. But we can never eliminate fear. We can only manipulate it. But what if your fear is alive that can follow, hurt and even devour you. What would you feel? What will you do? That is Jordi.

Jordi is the second story from the David and Lisa book. It is another case of a schizophrenic child. Although Jordi was fictional but his story is true even for most of us.

In the book, a line says

Even he didn’t “know” it. But he felt it-yes, he felt it.

Jordi was sensitive. Very sensitive. And most of us are. This is why

stick and stones don’t hurt as much as words

This line also reminds me of the other night when my mother got angry with my brother. Mama said that he is insensitive to other people around him.

At some point my mother is right. My brother is in his adolescent stage and it is all “me and the world” right now to him. But I felt sick that I had to cover my ears when my mother started using the words “gago” (fool) & “malaki kang tanga” (so stupid) to my brother.

Mama wasn’t like that to me and my older brother. But she has seen huge potential in my younger sibling to the point that she has huge expectations as well.

Oh well, a mother with heart problems and an adolescent son is a bad combination already, I just hope that my brother would not let those words affect him so much because

 even it was just fleeting words. He might felt it.

Going back to Jordi. Here’s a paragraph that I liked.

The scene outside the window was a new one. He did not want to step into the scene. The handle of his seat in the bus was his grip on himself. He couldn’t let go-he would surely lose himself. He heard them reasoning and pleading, but he felt that theirs were foreign voices.

Change. All of us had this moment when we would hold on to the past and much of our present would not make sense anymore. The moment when you started thinking that if you move on and lose all those that reminds you of the past – you might also lose yourself. Especially if that past is a big part of who you are.

And much of what the paragraph says is true, we cannot expect help from others when it comes to moving on because nothing of what they say would matter. It will all boil down to oneself.

If there is any thought I got form this story, that is- we are not that different from Jordi. Jordi was just misunderstood.

Enjoy the story.

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